That morning Sigizmunda Yakovlevna woke up from a frantic scream:
- A-a-a-a-a! A-a-a-a-a-a!
Sigizmunda Yakovlevna didn't even realize at once what had happened. As it turned out, it was her neighbor, Klavdia Albertovna, who was shouting. After getting dressed, Sigizmunda Yakovlevna went out onto the porch, and yawning, asked:
- What's wrong?
- Ludwig Wolfganganovich has been stolen! Aah!
- Who? - Sigismunda Yakovlevna asked in a still sleepy voice.
- Greedy bastards!
Only then Sigismunda Yakovlevna began to realize what had happened. Klavdia Albertovna's cat, Ludwig Wolfgangovich, whom everyone called Eruption because of his terrible character, had disappeared. And his mistress was piously sure that he had been stolen.
- Who could have stolen it? - Sigismunda Yakovlevna asked.
- Anyone, Simochka, anyone! - wailed the neighbor - he's so handsome! And a thoroughbred, too!
In fact, the handsome Ludwig Wolfgangovich was an unintelligent, half-crazy, and in addition unusually vicious Persian cat. And Sigismunda Yakovlevna could not even imagine who would have thought of stealing him. But for Klavdia Albertovna he was the dearest thing in the world. So Sigismunda Yakovlevna asked:
- And when would it be stolen? You're always at home.
- Who knows... I just woke up and my handsome boy was gone! Probably stolen while I was asleep. They must have known I couldn't hear anything.
And it was true - Klavdia Albertovna was almost deaf, and during the day she wore a hearing aid, so she could communicate with her children, relatives and neighbors, but at night she took it off and could hear nothing at all. It was useless to ask her neighbor if someone had visited her yesterday - her memory was almost as bad as her hearing. So Sigismunda Yakovlevna asked cautiously:
- Did you find any note, Klavdia Albertovna?
- With a ransom demand?
- Well... at least.
- No, he didn't leave anything, the bastard. Oh, he wants to buy a fur coat for my handsome boy!
- And I think that your Ludwig is all right - trying to speak seriously, replied Sigismunda Yakovlevna - and soon you will call and tell you where he is.
- Really? - Klavdia Albertovna asked with hope in her voice.
- Of course he will. Or he could come home on his own. I mean, you take good care of him, and he couldn't have gotten far. Besides, he's your ... quite a bright cat, and he knows everyone who lives nearby. So, yeah, he'll either come back on his own or someone will.
- Oh, Simochka," sighed the neighbor, "your words are in God's ears. Poor my handsome, poor Ludwig.....
To be honest, after this conversation Sigismunda Yakovlevna was almost certain that she had calmed Klavdia Albertovna down. But, as it turned out, if she had, it was only for a short time.
A few days after this conversation Vita came running to Sigismunda Yakovlevna. This time she was neither happy nor upset, but very angry. After calming down and taking a breath, she said:
- Grandma, that neighbor of yours has lost her mind!
- Why?
- You're still asking? Yesterday the veterinary hospital came to our school to warn us about parasites and vaccinations. So this Klavdia Albertovna came to the class and started telling everyone about some animal thieves who steal animals! - Vita finally calmed down and added, "And we are adults, but can you imagine if she got into elementary school?
Sigismunda Yakovlevna was shocked. She was in complete agreement with her granddaughter, and was afraid to even think what else Klavdia Albertovna might do. In addition, the other old ladies could also add fuel to the fire.
- What if she overhears their conversations and misunderstands everything? - Sigismunda Yakovlevna thought.
And again she looked as if in water. Klavdia Albertovna did not frighten any more children either at school or anywhere else, but a few days later she came home to Sigismunda Yakovlevna herself.
- Simochka, trouble! - she said, crying.
- What happened? - Sigismunda Yakovlevna was frightened.
- The girls said that before Ludwig disappeared, they saw a white car in the yard. That's who took my handsome boy! The whole yard confirmed it!
By the way, Klavdia Albertovna called many people "girls" - from schoolgirls to girls her own age (or even older). It turns out that she and Ludwig really had someone... And there were no signs of forced entry, otherwise it would have been reported long ago... And then Sigismunda Yakovlevna realized where to go. Klavdia Albertovna had a grandson, Vanya. He was already an adult, twenty-six years old, he had his own car, and he often came to his grandmother to help in any way. And the car was white....
Fortunately, Sigismunda Yakovlevna had the address of Klavdia Albertovna's grandson. She went to the right apartment and rang the doorbell. Vanya opened the door at once.
- Hello, Sigismunda Yakovlevna!" he said softly, and added in a whisper, "don't make any noise, Ludwig is asleep!
Sigismunda Yakovlevna was alarmed that Vanya spoke with such tenderness about his grandmother's cat, which was feared not only by him, but also by everyone who knew Ludwig, aka the Pervert.
- Come in - Vanya led Sigizmunda Yakovlevna into the room, and when she sat down, he asked - Is anything wrong? Is grandma in trouble?
- Tell me first, where did you take Ludwig? And your grandmother, she's... worried," Sigismunda Yakovlevna finished.
Vanya grabbed his head.
- I told her many times that I was taking Ludwig to the hospital! - he groaned - I left a note too!
- Well, then, she forgot. You know she has no memory," replied Sigismunda Yakovlevna, "and she might have lost the note, or it might have been blown away by the wind, and your grandmother never even saw it.
Then Ludwig, who had woken up, crawled out of the next room, yawned, and Sigismunda Yakovlevna saw that he had...no teeth. None at all.
- Uh, what's that? What's that? - she asked.
And Vanya explained. It turned out that Ludwig had had problems with his gums and teeth for years, and when he was last admitted to the hospital they had only found this solution.
Sigismunda Yakovlevna was not one of the fearful, but she was afraid to even think how Klavdia Albertovna might behave.
Fortunately, everything turned out all right. When Klavdia Albertovna saw her friend, she was very happy.
- Grandmother, - Vanya warned her - you see, the thing is that Ludwig... Anyway, he is now without teeth.
Then Ludwig yawned again, and Klavdia Albertovna saw everything herself. But... she wasn't upset at all.
- You're my good man! - She smiled - you're toothless now too, aren't you? Don't worry, I'll make you porridge. They're delicious, you'll see!
She was glad to have her friend with her again. And Ludwig, by the way, was much calmer.
The end