ACTING PERSONS: Librarian Phobos, Little Red Riding Hood, Schoolgirl, Old Lady, Old Lady's granddaughter - Sonechka, Zanuda, Feldman Vera Yakovlevna, Audience.
Scene One.
It's late evening. The lights are on in the library, though only one man with dark hair, glasses, and...dragon wings sits at the desk.
Librarian Phobos. Yes, yes, the main character of this story is me, the librarian Phobos. Although I must tell you, dear viewers, that I am a modest man, and do not consider myself a hero. Although at his work your humble servant really often made feats. But I don't think so - my readers and friends think so. Our library is special, because not only ordinary people come here, but also literary heroes. For example, Little Red Riding Hood. She and her grandmother run a pastry shop, and Little Red Riding Hood often borrows recipe books from me. But once she asked me for a cookbook that was not a cookbook at all... (he remembers) I got carried away... You want to see everything with your own eyes, don't you?
Audience. (Chorus) Yes!
Librarian Phobos. Then I'll begin!
Scene Two.
Librarian Phobos sits at the checkout counter. Little Red Riding Hood approaches the counter.
Red Riding Hood. Hello. Do you have any books about wolves?
Librarian Phobos. About wolves? Why?
Little Red Riding Hood. I want to make friends with a wolf. And to do that, I need to learn to understand all wolves.
Librarian Phobos. Are any other animals of interest to you?
Red Riding Hood. Yes
Librarian Phobos. Then I have some suitable books. They're all about animal behavior. Let's go and look together!
Red Riding Hood. Of course we will, thank you!
Librarian Phobos and Little Red Riding Hood leave. After a while Little Red Riding Hood goes home with the books and Librarian Phobos returns to his seat.
Librarian Phobos. A girl grows up, wolves want to understand...But ordinary people also come to us, and among them not everyone can so clearly explain what they need....
Scene Three.
Librarian Phobos sits at the checkout counter. A schoolgirl approaches the counter.
Schoolgirl. Do you have a book...about trunks?
Librarian Phobos. Do you need a book about elephants?
Schoolgirl. No, the trunk book, my brother asked me.
Librarian Phobos. Why would your brother want this book? Maybe he's seen some movie recently? Or did you two watch it together?
Schoolgirl. Yeah, he did.
Librarian Phobos. What do these trunks look like?
Schoolgirl. They look like gnomes, only without the beard.
Librarian Phobos. Wait, I've got it all figured out.
After a moment, he returns, and holds out to the Girl the book "The Hobbit or There and Back Again". The girl takes it and leaves.
Librarian Phobos. That's the story. But it's not just kids who are difficult.
Scene Four.
Librarian Phobos is sitting at the checkout counter. A very old grandmother approaches the counter.
Librarian Phobos. Hello, did you want something?
Old lady. Yes. Do you have a book... (after a short pause) about dovecote?
Librarian Phobos. Do you need a cookbook?
Old lady No... My granddaughter asked me, she wants to read it.
Librarian Phobos. How old is she?
Old lady Oh, just turned six...Sonechka's name is Sonechka.
Librarian Phobos. So bring your Sonya to me. Let her tell me what kind of book she wants.
The next day the old lady returns with a girl of about five or six years old.
Old Sonechka, what book did you want to read? I remember there was something about a dove?
Sonechka (angrily) Grandmother, not a dove! Plas-te-lin of rings!
Librarian Phobos. Sonechka, how do you know about this book? Have you seen some movie?
Sonechka. Yes!
Librarian Phobos. Then I think I've figured out what book you and Grandma need.
Librarian Phobos goes out and returns with the book "The Lord of the Rings". Sonechka and Grandma take the book and leave.
Librarian Phobos. It's hard when a person can't tell you what book they want. But there are other difficulties. For example, the Red Queen demands that everyone's heads be chopped off. And then there's the one time we had a very boring person come in. That's what I called her. I'll never forget that meeting.
Scene Five.
A woman, wearing a strict suit and her hair in a bun, walks up to the book counter.
Librarian Phobos. Hi, can I help you?
Nerd. Hello, I need a dictionary urgently.
Librarian Phobos. We have many dictionaries. Which one do you want?
Nerd. Anything to help me teach people how to speak and write correctly. I am terribly tired of the speech errors of those around me.
Librarian Phobos. Well, if you don't like them that much, then....
Nerd. (interrupts) Yes! I don't like it! I can't stand wrong accents! I also hate it when people argue with me!
Librarian Phobos leaves and returns with a large stack of thick dictionaries.
Librarian Phobos. Here you go, these are all our dictionaries that have something about accents and spelling.
Nerd (angrily) Thank you!
The nerd exits. Librarian Phobos is left alone.
Librarian Phobos. Gone... It is good that such readers in our library are very few and they come very rarely. Still, there is one big plus in my work, besides being near books and being able to read as much as I want. These are the readers with whom it is a pleasure for me to communicate. They have long been a real outlet for me. I will tell you about one of these readers now.
Scene Six.
A beautiful tall woman with shoulder-length dark hair and large gray eyes approaches the book counter.
Vera Yakovlevna. Good evening, Mr. Phobos!
Librarian Phobos. ( smiling ) Vera Yakovlevna! Good to see you. Do you need anything?
Vera Yakovlevna. (also with a smile) I must, I must. You see, I need to make a dessert.
Librarian Phobos. As I recall, you've always been a great cook. Or will someone else do the cooking?
Vera Yakovlevna. (laughs) Here's the thing: Martha, my granddaughter, will soon have a birthday, her eighteenth birthday. And Martha wants us to make her a dessert. I forgot the name of it. But wait a minute, she gave me a piece of paper. Here it is. It's called gulab jamun. Do you have a book with the recipe for this dish?
Librarian Phobos. I think I've seen one of these somewhere... I'll get it for you.
A moment later, the librarian Phobos returns with a book of Eastern desserts.
Librarian Phobos. Here you go, Vera Yakovlevna, there's definitely gulab jamun here, I even checked it. You can make something else with Marta later, if she likes gulab jamun.
Vera Yakovlevna. ( smiling ) Thank you very much! Goodbye!
Vera Yakovlevna leaves. Librarian Phobos is left alone again.
Librarian Phobos. (sighs) Gone... It's a pleasure to help people like that. And I wish you, whoever you work for, that you meet them more often. That's my story. I gotta go.
Librarian Phobos goes to the window and flies away.
The end